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It took me years to discover that one of the best ways to maintain emotional control is to key in on an “It’s okay” attitude. This attitude is built on the premise that if there is nothing that I can do about a situation, then why should I get emotionally involved with it? Few of us are immune to the little things that can get under our skin and endanger our emotional well-being. There is the traffic jam on the way to work…the driver in front of us going ten miles below the speed limit…a business associate who is late on a project…a spouse who...
TONE OF VOICE Do you realize that every time we speak, we speak twice? I don’t mean that we speak with a “forked tongue.” What I mean is that the words that come out of our mouths convey our thoughts, while our tone of voice reflects our attitude. What we say is important, but the way it is said is more important, wouldn’t you think? Think from your own experience. You sense when someone is telling you something, and the tone of voice isn’t backing the words up with feelings, don’t you? Sure, you do. How often have you been on the other side...
I believe it is not all bad when beginning something new and different to use the performances of others as a means of measurement. Others in similar situations establish the ground rules. They provide a yardstick. But once we know the rules, we should turn our attention to what we are doing, not what others are doing or have done, don’t you think? When the focus is on the performances of others, we lose sight of what we are capable of doing. I have discovered that champions don’t waste time and energy concerning themselves with how others are...
You are in the midst of a crucial situation. Your heart begins to pound more than normal. Your palms become sweaty. A big lump hovers in your throat. It is “crunch time?” Are you ready to perform at a higher level? Why is it that the same situational pressures and fears that hold some back are the same ones that propel others forward full throttle? For the latter group, the margin of error goes out the window when a big reward is on the line. A significant factor in being human is that when the stakes are high, the anxiety level within can sig...
There is no stress in your life, is there? Okay, I know the answer. Not surprised by that answer, either. Much of our stress is a by-product of fear. Think about it. If we had no fears, we would have no need to stress about anything, would we? We allow ourselves to become uptight over finances, careers, health, relationships, and a ton of smaller, less significant areas of our lives, don’t we? I know. I have been there. No doubt, life would be lived far more productively and joyfully if there was no stress in our lives. But that’s just not rea...
Follow these General Rules For Staying Focused: Concentration is a key factor in bringing a rational base to any important situations. The following are some general ground rules for you to think about if you need to work on improving your ability to concentrate: ALWAYS BE WHERE YOU ARE. All power is futile unless it is focused. Unless you direct all your energies to one point, you will never perform any task quite as capable as you possibly could. ONE THING AT ONCE. It is a proven fact that the quickest way to get many things accomplished is...
Our character and reputation will make us… or break us -- in life. Character is what we are -- our private substance. Reputation is what others think we are – our public image. A reputation is a message about us that grows and travels by word of mouth. Yet, a reputation is a fragile thing, it can be easily fractured should we compromise on character. Upright character is the only sound foundation for a solid reputation. The events of daily life not only build character -- they reveal character. If we do not possess the major ingredient of chara...
When things are not going our way, isn’t there a tendency to “pass the buck?” I mean it is relative easy to blame someone or something else, when we come up short, isn’t it? You know where the first recorded incident of “passing the buck” is located? It is found in the Bible in the first chapter of Genesis. The scene finds Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden. As the plot unfolds, Eve is confronted by a sleek looking, smooth talking serpent. The serpent talks Eve into eating fruit from a forbidden tree that God had previously told Adam and Eve wa...
Let me recant the parable of Sadhu Sing, a Hindu convert to Christianity, who became a missionary to India. Late one afternoon, Sadhu and a monk were traveling on foot through the Himalayas. It was bitter cold, and night was approaching. The monk warned Sadhu that they were in danger of freezing to death if they did not reach the monastery before darkness fell. Just as they entered a narrow path above a steep precipice, they heard a cry for help. Down the cliff lay a man, who had fallen and hurt himself badly. The monk looked at Sadhu and...
I have learned a few things about being a parent via observation over the years. I believe it is worthy of spending some time on. May I begin by reminding those who have young children, they grow up only once. That’s the theme of the message that I want to share with you. I have younger friends who still work 350 days a year, 12 to 15 hours per day, ignoring their family, making more money than they ever can spend, not physically taking care of themselves. Why? Everybody can see their material success, but beneath it, and behind it, are the a...
Everybody can see the material success of an individual. But beneath it, and behind it, we often find the ashes created by the chasing of false dreams. “I’m doing it for my family’s future,” is the war cry. Eventually, the truth is there for all to see when the family doesn’t work out the way one wants. I was lucky. I was not a great dad. But things turned out well, thanks in great part to the mother of our two sons. Let me share an incident with you about a dad who wasn’t as fortunate as me. Dick Heyman is not his name, but it will do. Di...
One of my “careers” was short-lived. For four years, I worked as a stockbroker with Merrill Lynch in Dallas. The first six months, for the most part, was spent out of the office making calls to potential clients. The stock market at the time was in throes of what was known as a “bear market.” For those of you who do not “play” the market, that means the market was not very good. I really enjoyed getting out and meeting people. I did so well at “cold calling” that I received a certificate of recognition from the company. One of the individuals...
